Realism
Characters: OPTIMIST
PESSIMIST
REALIST
Setting: In a bar. OPTIMIST and PESSIMIST are sitting across the table from each other with half a mug of beer between them.
OPTIMIST
The mug is half full.
PESSIMIST
The mug is half empty.
OPTIMIST
It’s half full.
PESSIMIST
It’s half empty.
OPTIMIST
Half full!
PESSIMIST
Half empty!
[REALIST walks to the table, glares at them, grabs the mug, drinks the beer and burps. OPTIMIST and PESSIMIST look at each other.]
PESSIMIST
Hah! Now it’s totally empty.
OPTIMIST
It’s… uh… completely unfull.
PESSIMIST
Totally empty!
OPTIMIST
Completely unfull!
[REALIST walks away shaking his head as OPTIMIST and PESSIMIST start punching each other.]
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